Anonymous Research

Anonymous Research

In the last few weeks I have been trying to find more personal accounts from Transgender individuals. I did at first find it quite difficult to get people to come forward and speak to me, but after posting an online anonymous survey I managed to get some responses.

Person Number 1:

Q1: What pressures does society put on you as a Transgender individual? (Please be as detailed as possible)

I feel pressured to be more masculine when people learn that I'm a trans man. Normally, they just treat me as a lesbian. People always assume I am a lesbian, because of my masculinity. I like masculinity myself. I think people just think that trans people can't be unique.

Q2: What was it like when you were transitioning? or if you are currently what is it like? (Please be as detailed as possible)

I am pre-op everything. The options I have as a trans guy are pretty low picking. I can get top surgery, and personally look like an old guy. I could get bottom surgery, and possibly not even be able to get hard or get off. I'd rather have one inch that works, than five that is lazy. I am trying to get approved for a breast reduction down to a size A for back pain, which I do have. Hopefully that will work, because I am now a large breast size. That will help my issues a lot. However, my body issues aren't that bad anymore. I used to be very self conscience, then I came to the conclusion that I never wanted to look cisgender, so now I am more confident.

Q3: Have you  ever experienced any discrimination? (Please be as detailed as possible)

Yes, but what discrimination was given to me due to being a quiet person, or because people think I like girls is hard to say. I came from the south, where people always looked at me weird. I got told quit a few times I was in the wrong bathroom. My dad molested me. I think partly due to me being quiet, and that I dressed so masculine he thought I had low self esteem. I think I showed him by putting him in jail for 20 years that wasn't the case.

Q4: Has society affected your identity in any way? (Please be as detailed as possible)

Yes, I am naturally quiet, but I tend to be more quit. I live with my partner and our dog. We are both trans, and we don't have friends. We have tried, but people tend to be transphobic, and we just got tired of hearing negative stuff. We have met some people who were trans that we got along with really well, right before we moved here to Maine from Georgia. We do hope to make some more friends up here who are trans. I have tried to make us some friends, but it seems as soon as they learn we aren't lesbians, and that we are gay guys.. people look at us like we have mental issues and stop wanting to hang out with us. I am 28, and feel at this point in my life I'm complete with my partner of almost five years. I would like friends here, but I am not going to put up with people who don't like me for me.

Person Number 2:

Q1: What pressures does society put on you as a Transgender individual? (Please be as detailed as possible)

I don't accept the premise of this question.

There are pressures associated with seeking treatment from the NHS - the need to accept their pathologisation of being a transsexual. There are also pressures from individuals who expect you to conform to certain stereotypes.

Q2: What was it like when you were transitioning? or if you are currently what is it like? (Please be as detailed as possible)

I have enjoyed transitioning very much. I am shortly to undergoing GRS, however I do not consider this the end of any process. I am proud to be a transwoman, and that is what I will remain. I hated living in my assigned gender, and despite facing problems, I am a happier and more confident person now.

Q3: Have you  ever experienced any discrimination? (Please be as detailed as possible)

Yes. My employer would not accept me transitioning, and whilst I knew I had legal rights I decided to look for nother job in order to bring transitioning fully. Eventually I was successful - but now I am back with my former employer - he saw the error of his ways and asked me back!

Q4: Has society affected your identity in any way? (Please be as detailed as possible)

Society affects everybody's identity in every way.

Person Number 3:

Q1: What pressures does society put on you as a Transgender individual? (Please be as detailed as possible)

To conform to gender stereotypes.

to understand who I am at all times.

to be patient with transphobic people.

to rush through transition.

to give explanations about things about myself and my body.

Q2: What was it like when you were transitioning? or if you are currently what is it like? (Please be as detailed as possible)

Stressful. I struggle to pass, but have my name changed, i dont know whether I will be read as male or female.

Been messed around by the healthcare system.

Q3: Have you  ever experienced any discrimination? (Please be as detailed as possible)

In healthcare, because I am trans and mentally ill, I was denied transition of the grounds of being too unstable.

Q4: Has society affected your identity in any way? (Please be as detailed as possible)

Yes. Society made it really hard for me to work out what my identity was due to stereotypes.

Person Number 4:

Q1: What pressures does society put on you as a Transgender individual? (Please be as detailed as possible)

Mostly to NOT be a trans individual, to many it is seen as abnormal, whether they avoid seeing the necessity of it for certain people.

Q2: What was it like when you were transitioning? or if you are currently what is it like? (Please be as detailed as possible)

Tough, often. Exciting but tough, every day is different, sometimes every hour, but it gets better as time goes on. Some emotions are serious depression 'is life worth having to do all this' 'why was i so unlucky'. There are strange, almost nausiating emotions too, such as if I look back on school, it literally feels like i'm looking into someone elses mind intensely, because it very much feels like... how could that child/young adult been me?

But generally for me transition is a trial with it's good and bad moments, many things are new and exciting, such as building confidence with what I wear (I'm often all cute and girly), and the ever-attempt at reclaiming my 'lost childhood'.

Q3: Have you  ever experienced any discrimination? (Please be as detailed as possible)

1) Chavs in anonymous masks in the street tried to verbally bash me once, but i told them to f*** off and gave a middle finger... I wasn't taking it.

2) Once in Perdu ( a Newcastle club- very popular with new students ), I went to go to the toilet with a friend (girl thing I've learnt), we were in fancy dress, I was Alice from Alice Madness Returns i'd made, and i was stopped by two bouncers and denied me access, i asked why, and they made mention of me having a c*** (Xray vision or something i presume), so i reported them to the manager, but wasnt satisfied so I reported them to the police, a policeman came round and didnt even know what transgender was...

These were earlyish-transition situations.

Q4: Has society affected your identity in any way? (Please be as detailed as possible)

I guess it is impossible to really avoid ALL societal influences, they engineer most of how we walk, talk, and what we like and dislike, but more than most as a trans individual in particular, I think i've learnt to ignore society a lot, such as my children will be brought up ungendered in what they like, so no... heres pink for you as you're a girl, and no- no you can't dress as Elsa for Halloween, you're a boy. Society shouldn't box people up, it does noone any good. I recognise I am a female, and 99% of people see me that way everyday, but I feel comfortable that I love gaming, and develop games, and love fantasy art etc- those kinds of things make you more perfectly unique! :)

Person Number 5:

Q1: What pressures does society put on you as a Transgender individual? (Please be as detailed as possible)

Respondent skipped this question

Q2: What was it like when you were transitioning? Or if you are currently what is it like? (Please be as detailed as possible)

When I transitioned it was a fair few years back, I was nervous - terrified even - of most people, as I expected the worst from them - and in several cases I got it, friends I'd known since childhood wanted nothing to do with me, my grandfather decided I didn't exist - even when I was in the room with him, many of my relatives took their cues from him. Several of my aunts and uncles took to being offensive and inappropriate. My immediate relatives - my mother and brother accepted it and helped, and even my father came around after a while.

Q3: Have you ever experienced any discrimination? (Please be as detailed as possible)

Yes. I received discrimination from places I have worked, general public and from blood relatives. In regards to work, I have been fired from jobs by people who do not support or accept transgender people, I have also not been paid on occasion for work done (one person actually said it was because i am transgender). I don't tend to get much (hardly any in fact) abuse from the public at large any more, but have been hunted through the streets of the town I lived in a few years back, on a number of occasions, by a gang of eight to ten late teenagers. I get lots of support from my immediate family, but have received discrimination from my late grandfather and my aunts and uncles. I was once shot at from a passing car, with an air pistol

Q4: Has society affected your identity in any way? (Please be as detailed as possible)

I tend to be apprehensive in regards to work situations and tend not to trust the work environment. I have friends who are very supportive and I vowed never to be as afraid as I was when being hunted through the streets of Swindon, I now stand up for myself when abused and discriminated against (potentially risky, I know)